they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Randomize
