Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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