Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
