We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Randomize
