Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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