I just woke up to a lawnchair covered in lipstick. I'm wearing red lipstick. What happened and is the tequila?
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize