hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Randomize
