We're like a lot better than the average bears
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
