You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
