it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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