i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
