I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
