i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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