I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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