Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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