he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
