that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
