She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize