I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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