Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Randomize
