I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
It's like God shit irony all over that family
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
