Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
Randomize
