i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
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