what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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