Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Randomize