I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
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