Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Randomize
