ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Damn victory sex feels great
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
