On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Randomize
