I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Randomize
