I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
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