hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
She announced her abortion via fbk
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Randomize
