can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Randomize
