Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
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