He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
Randomize