I can text with my tongue
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
