Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Randomize
