I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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