I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
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