ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
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