I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize