I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Randomize
