let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Randomize
