I hate all girls vehemently.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
I'm always down for nudity.
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