i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
