marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
