Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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