ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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