Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
I'm having to shit out rocks
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