and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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