Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
